I Am Thankful For Brett

    When my children were little I taught them how to eat, use the restroom, ride a bike, tie their shoes, I helped them with homework, etc. That was one of my jobs as a mother. I never dreamed my children would be teaching me so much. I have been writing a lot about Brett and some of the hard things he has gone through. Believe me there is much more that has happened to Brett, but you may be tired of reading injury stories. I have always believed that we learn a lot from what happens to us and it shapes who we are. Our family has grown closer and we learned to really value, love and support each other because of the hard times our family has been through together.

This family has a lot of love for each other

     Brett could have easily felt bitter over all the illnesses and injuries that have happened to him. Instead, in one of his darkest moments, throwing up from severe pain and with tears running down his face he told me he had a lot to be thankful for. Brett has impressed me with his ability to not let anything keep him down and he will even joke about the bad things that happen to him. I do wish though that he wouldn't play dodge ball right after breaking his collarbone or sneak out and play soccer the day he gets his wisdom teeth out. So he still has a few things to learn. I am going to go through each of my children but these are just a few of the many ways Brett has touched my life.

    I don't know if compassion is just part of who Brett is or if he developed his love for people because of his life's experiences, but he has loved almost everybody and tried to find the good in everyone. His love for family, friends and strangers has deeply touched me many times.

    Brett really worried about a boy named John in his high school who looked lonely. He wanted John to be happy and have friends. He worked hard to be his friend at school and invited him to go places and do things with him outside of school. They had a lot of fun together. Sadly, after Brett left school, this boy took his own life. Brett wrote the most loving tribute I have ever read to John's family about all that they had done and about the amazing person John was. I wished everyone was like Brett, so this boy's family wouldn't have lost him and they would not be so sad. We should all be looking for lonely people and making a difference.

    I also remember a time when Brett befriended a boy who was being bullied. This made the bully turn on Brett and make his life very miserable. He would come home very upset because of how mean this bully was to him. He never once regretted helping this boy and he kept being his friend.

Brett and his friend Kevin

   














      Brett and his friend Kevin started their own little organization they called Sending Smiles Incorporated. They would pray over who needed to be cheered up and then they would leave presents and candy on someone's doorstep with a note from Sending Smiles Inc. The two of them spent a lot of time on their notes and presents and making sure they did not get caught. They wanted to remain anonymous. They were 19 years old and just wanted to make people happy.

    Brett chose to help out Ronald McDonald House as an eagle service project. Ronald McDonald House houses and feeds families of children who are seriously ill or injured, children who have cancer or who need transplants at Children's Hospital. We printed up and stapled together 1000 fliers asking for donations. Our family and Brett's friends helped us drop off fliers and pick up donations. It was a lot of work. We got so many donations we filled up a big truck and a van. We were taken on a tour when we dropped off donations and we were impressed with all this place does for these families. We were the most touched by a 7 year old Armenian boy we met and his mother, who had been in this country for over a year, away from their family. This boy had had over 50 surgeries to remove cancerous tumors that kept growing in his throat. He had a huge smile in spite of it all. It made us happy we were helping. One of our volunteers who went with us was born without a hip socket and Ronald McDonald House had housed her and her family while she had surgery, so this project also meant a lot to her. Brett loved doing this for people he didn't even know.

Stapling together the fliers to drop off at people's houses

Brett's friends who helped him out

We had donations all over the floor in 3 rooms of our house

At Ronald McDonald House

    At the age of 19 Brett left for a 2 year mission for our church. He wanted to go out and teach people about what makes him and our family so happy. He was called to serve in Brazil. He worked with a lot of very poor people in Brazil and again his compassion could not overlook those who needed him. He helped hand out wheelchairs (our church provided them) to people who were too poor to afford them and loved seeing how happy these people were to get one. He said one boy excitedly rode up and down the street in his, the first time in his life this boy knew the freedom of going wherever he wanted. One Christmas I asked Brett what he wanted me to send him for Christmas. All Brett wanted was for me to send him a lot of small toys that he could give to the children in Brazil. He said that a lot of these children came from very poor families who could not afford any Christmas presents. He loved handing out toys on Christmas, being like a Santa Claus. The kids loved him. He also asked me once if I would send a box to his companion, who never got any packages or letters at all from home. We had fun making him boxes. Brett also always shared what we sent him with the people there.

Brett was well loved in Brazil

Testing his luck eating the fruit

     I was happy Brett was so well loved because several times while he was in Brazil he had bad allergic reactions to the fruits and he swelled up pretty bad or he would throw up for days. The people over there helped him even though they have very little. The people of Brazil were amazing like that. They would want to feed him or give him medicine even if they had very little for their own families. I am very grateful for the big hearts in Brazil.

     Brett wanted to help the people so much in Brazil that sometimes he would help even when it made it so that he had to suffer. He met a man who would collect things at the dump to sell. That is the only way this man had of supporting his family. This man had to sleep at the dump with a gun to protect what he had found because other people would try to steal it from him. It would get very cold in the winter and this man didn't have warm clothes to protect him from the cold elements. We got a call from Brett's mission president saying that Brett needed a warm coat, that he was stuffing his clothes with newspaper trying to stay warm and it was bitter cold. We knew we had bought him a nice warm coat before he left. We found out he had given this man his coat because he felt like this man needed it worse than he did. After that he gave away a pair of shoes and gave away some of his clothes. He just couldn't help it. He felt like they needed his clothes more than he did. Before he left his mission he gave away a lot of his clothes. He figured he could get more clothes but they wouldn't be able to afford to buy clothes.

His friends in Brazil threw a birthday party for Brett

  There have been more than a few times people who have told me that Brett was a hero to their children or themselves. I have been touched many times by the way he lives his life. I keep thinking of more stories but I will save them for later.

Thank you Brett for all you have taught me. I feel very blessed to be your mother. 

When Brett got his eagle badge

  

 

The Good Samaritan

“But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, …..” ----- Luke 10:33

     What makes a hero? I have always loved the bible story about the good Samaritan. I love all good samaritan stories. These people are my heroes. I think we all need help at some time in our lives. I am very grateful for the good samaritans who have come into my life. Good samaritans will show up a lot in the stories of my family's lives. And if we have the chance to be a good samaritan, what is more awesome than coming to the rescue when someone needs us the most?
     I love my children and I would give my own life to save them if I had to. There is no greater love than what a parent has for a child. I can't always be there to protect and look after my children so I pray every day for their safety and for other people to look out for and love them when I am not around. Those who have done that for me are my heroes. I will tell you 2 stories about Brett and the people who helped him.

     On a hot August day our family went up to Winter Park for a day of fun. During the summer this ski resort is a place to ride the alpine slide, climb climbing walls, play miniature golf, run through the maze and many other fun activities. Winn, and my sons Brett and Adam love to mountain bike so they would often take the chairlift up the mountain to ride down. On this particular day they decided to ride down an advanced trail. I played with the other kids at the base of the mountain. We were all supposed to meet at a particular time and place later. We waited and waited and they didn't come at the appointed time. Hours later Adam came down and told us that Brett had been hurt. He had hit a root in the trail on a sharp turn and shot off the trail and hit a tree. When he hit the tree, a tree branch went into his leg clear to the bone. His leg was spurting out blood pretty fast. Brett had gotten separated from his Dad and brother when he got hurt. It was another biker who found him bleeding by the side of the trail. This man stopped and tied off his leg with a bike inner tube. This man summoned more help to get him down the mountain. Adam rode up on the scene and he rode down to tell us to meet them in the first-aid station. By the time Brett got down the mountain he was sick, lightheaded and in a lot of pain. The people working in the clinic cleaned his wound, slowed the bleeding, wrapped his leg and told us to take him straight to the doctor when we got home.

He felt light-headed and sick and he was in a lot of pain

     We drove home and I took him to urgent care because our doctor's office was closed. He was x-rayed and the doctor spent a lot of time flushing out the hole in his leg to make sure there were no wooden pieces left in his leg. After it was cleaned out they stitched up his leg. He was in a lot of pain and could hardly walk for a few days. His leg swelled up and got really red and we got worried it was infected. It eventually healed up. I am so grateful for this man who stopped to help Brett. This man disappeared after Brett was brought down and I felt bad I couldn't meet and thank him. He was my hero. 

recovering at home

   This wasn't the only time Brett needed a good samaritan. He has needed them often at college when he has broken bones and gotten bad sprains or on camping trips, etc. 

After another mountain biking crash

A very bad sprain he couldn't walk on for a few days

Just one of many

     Brett went skiing with his Dad one winter day. They love to race each other down the mountain. As Winn went sailing down the mountain he skied past Brett. Brett is very competitive and doesn't like anyone to beat him. This is Brett's account of that day, “Sometimes an act of kindness can make a big difference in our lives. Last week a total stranger helped me. I was skiing with my Dad when my Dad passed me and gave me a little shove and kept going. (Winn claims he gave Brett a little nudge and Brett tried to get him with his pole. Who know with their desire to win the race.)  I lost my balance and fell breaking my nose with my pole. I tried to ski further but I was bleeding heavily all over the snow so I had to stop. People kept passing by until finally, on the brink of me passing out, a couple stopped to help me out. The wife went to get the ski patrol while the man flagged people down for kleenex. The toboggan took me down to the clinic and there the man stayed with me for a few hours to keep me company and keep my mind off my pain. I was very grateful for the help of these strangers.” Brett had rammed his pole into his lip and nose hard enough he had a big swollen lip (solid black on the inside) and a broken nose. 

    This couple paid for ski tickets and they could have easily skied by him like a lot of other people did and figure someone else could stop and help him. Once he was safely in the clinic, this couple could have left and gone on skiing but instead they stayed with him for hours not getting to have the fun ski day they had planned. They put Brett first. I wish I could give them a hug. I wish they knew just how thankful I am. Winn couldn't find Brett and just thought he had lost track of him, so he went on skiing. At the end of the day, when he couldn't find him, he thought to check the clinic. Brett was miserable for the next week and missed a few days of school. His nose was broken across the top and on the bottom connecting his nose to his face. He kept picking up and moving the bottom of his nose when it got out of place, which gave us the chills. During his recovery, Dallin got too rough and re-broke it after it had started to heal. It was painful.

    We wrote this couple a thank you card and Brett wrote them a letter. It did not seem like enough. These were two more heroes in our lives. 

This was a post card sent to Brett by the ski patrol ^

A copy of the letter Brett sent to the people who helped him ^

     Winn and I went on a trip to Utah to visit relatives. On our way home Winn wanted to go on a different road than the one we usually travel on. I tried to talk him out of it because he usually picks narrow curvy roads that take longer. Winn likes to see new scenery. I would rather just get home and not have it take more than the usual 9 to 10 hours. I wanted to put up a fight but the thought came into my head that this was the way we needed to go. After Winn had traveled on this narrow road for a while, I noticed movement a ways off to the side of the road. I yelled at Winn to stop and I told him that I thought I saw someone standing on the roof of a car down a small embankment waving his arms. Winn stopped and turned around. There was a man standing on a dented up car with broken windows waving his arms. Another man was sitting on the ground bleeding. One of these young men spoke very little English and the other one spoke only Spanish. It was obvious they had been driving too fast on the curvy road and their car had rolled when they over-corrected on a turn. This road did not have many people traveling on it so they had been there for a while. We got out our first aid kit and bandaged them up the best we could. They were both shaken up. We gave them some of our food to eat and water to drink and drove them back to the nearest town so they could call family for help (we were in an area where cell phones didn't work). We dropped them off at a gas station to use the phone. I went inside to use the rest room and passed by these two young men again. The one who had gotten hurt the worst said something in Spanish to me and his eyes filled with tears. I gave him a big hug (the mother in me couldn't help it). As I hugged him I pictured his mother somewhere praying for him like I have prayed for my children.

“And he went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him.”-----Luke 10:34

“Which now of these three, thinketh thou was neighbor unto him that fell among thieves? And he said, He that shewed mercy on him. Then said Jesus unto him, Go, and do thou likewise.”------Luke 10: 36, 37

Note: As I was writing my last post and right before I posted it, Brett put up as a status on Facebook, “I guess no matter how many years you've been skiing, you can still hit a tree.” I called him up to see how he was and he told me he hit his thigh pretty hard and it “hurt wicked bad”, as he put it. But he skied 4 more runs because it was a good ski day and he just skied down one-legged. He borrowed his roommate's walker to get around after he got home. So does he ever play it safe? Not in my opinion. Will he need more good samaritans to help him in the future? I wish not, but I think he will because I know Brett. I'm glad he thinks scars are cool because he has plenty of them.

Fear Of Losing A Child

    I have had far too many times in my life when I have feared losing a child. The fear at times has griped me like hands around my neck and a knife in my stomach. While other mothers joked about how they hated breaks from school when their children were all home, or a friend would say she wished she could adopt Johnny out because he was driving her crazy, I could never say that, even jokingly. I have come too close too many times to losing a child. When faced with losing a child, it makes you look at every child as a miracle, each child as a gift, every day as a day to bask in what you have, look at every day as a day to live life to the fullest and appreciate every little morsel of what you have. 

Stitches, a broken collarbone, strep and an ear infection all at once

    I have already told you about 2 very bad experiences Brett has had to go through. I wish that that was all I had to tell you about what has happened to Brett, but it isn't. From the time Brett got old enough to walk, he loved to run, jump, climb and do everything active. He seemed to be missing the region in his brain which registers fear. He would ride his 4-wheel bike down the steep hill in our back yard and slam full force into the house over and over again. Even if he got hurt he would want to do it again. He was always falling, crashing or slamming into things.

     With this quest to have fun recklessly, came the increased likelihood of him getting hurt. His childhood was plagued with black eyes, stitches, and broken bones. He is still breaking bones. Just last year he broke his collar bone for the fifth time, skiing. https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1103097413903 He hadn't even recovered from this last broken collarbone when he participated in a Guinness World Book of Records event of the largest dodge ball game at BYU-Idaho where he attends college. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vUq243oD6U How crazy is that? That is how Brett lives his life.

He loves all things active and he has no fear

One of many black eyes

Stitches

He fell and fattened his lip and knocked his teeth loose

Another black eye

Because he knocked his front teeth out early he didn't have any front teeth for years and even got to be toothless with his older sister.

Stitches in his knee after a school recess mishap

A few days after having a boulder roll over him on a camping trip. The swelling in his hand has gotten better.

    One time after he fell and got stitches in his forehead, he had a bad experience getting his head sewed up when he hadn't been numbed up enough. It was a horrible experience for him. When I took him back later to get his stitches out he dove under a chair and grabbed onto the legs of it and would not come out for anything. He didn't trust the doctor after the last time. After that I always took his stitches out myself. He trusted me. 

The day of his 2nd collarbone break with his soccer team, his Dad the coach, and his brother Adam, the assistant coach.

At the end of the season they had a party, where they got trophies and played soccer for fun. Adam was trying to get the ball and ran too hard into Brett and broke his collarbone.

He was laid up in a lot of pain

Company while he recovers

He had practiced for weeks for field day at school and was really sad to miss it. He was on the Australian team of this Olympic style event. I went over to the school and asked if I could buy one of the medals and they gave me one, a bronze medal. He is pure gold to me.

Brett's Dad took Brett skiing often but on New Year's Day one year Brett took a bad fall and landed shoulder first into a snowbank and broke his collarbone for a 3rd time. He had to take a painful ride on the toboggan down through the moguls to the first aid station.

Forced to stay put against his will

His 4th broken collarbone came playing soccer only a few months after the previous one, on the opposite side. He also got strep and had a cough during recovery. He sobbed a few times after this one because he had too much at once.

    Another part of Brett getting hurt that deeply touched me came after Brett's worst collarbone break. His bones were broken all the way through and one of the sharp bones felt to Brett like it was going to poke through the skin, the pain was intense for him. It took hours one day for him to see 2 doctors and get x-rays and every time he was moved the pain was so bad that by the end of the day he was ghost white, in tears and throwing up. He had a long hard painful recovery from this break and I was relieved to get him better and back to school. He was told he had to be really careful for a few week while it continued to heal. He went to school in his sling and most of his friends knew he had had a bad collarbone break. Brett came home from his first day back at school and he was white, sick to this stomach and crying because he was in such bad pain. There was a boy at school who had tried to trip him over and over again all day.  Brett had to jerk his body to try to keep from falling, causing him a lot of pain. Anyone who knows me knows that I am missing the anger gene. I just never get mad. This was the first time I had real anger well up in me because of all that Brett had already been through. I wanted this boy's name and to make sure he was punished and talked to about what he'd done. I wanted this boy to realize what pain he had caused Brett. Brett would not give me his name, no matter how hard I begged. I knew if this boy was a bully that day he would be a bully the next day. Brett was the one most hurt by what this boy had done but he looked at me and told me that this boy must be really unhappy to treat people so badly and he didn't want to make his life worse. I didn't understand it but I was moved by his compassion, that he cared more about this other boy than what he himself was going through. I think a lot of what Brett has been through has given him a lot of compassion for people. He has always looked for the kids who didn't have friends and reached out to them. That same year at school the teachers picked 6 students out of his whole school to get special awards for their love and compassion for others. Brett was one of those six. He has been a hero to a lot of people in his life, especially me.

    It wasn't just all of these injuries that scared me for Brett but also the illnesses he had as a child. I have told you about his chicken pox and head surgeries already. I wanted to keep all of my stories about Brett together, just so you would better understand just how hard his life has been. When Brett was born he was diagnosed with a heart murmur and we had to take him to Childrens Hospital for tests. He was also plagued with scary bouts of croup, bronchitis and lung infections. It was the lung infections that scared me the most. Every time he got a cold or any sickness he would get bronchitis and a lung infection. These infections were brutal and very scary. His bronchial tubes would swell almost shut so that he would be gasping for air. His chest would cave in really far with his breaths. I was always scared these infections would kill him. The doctor told me that it was a feeling for Brett like having a pillow held over your face, like you were being suffocated and you were desperate for air. It took so much energy for his little body to gasp for the air he needed that he could not sleep at all and he could not eat anything. He needed all of his energy just to breath. I spent a lot of long nights rocking and singing to him, crying while I watched him struggle to breath and praying hard for him. It is during those long scary nights that my love for this child grew the strongest and also my love for God and his miracles and blessings. God had after all given me the view of just how valuable each one of my children is. I would hold Brett's little hand and look into his sweet face struggling to get air and watching his little body gasping to breath and keep thanking my Heavenly Father that I could have Brett as a child for another day to hold close and to love. I also felt deeply thankful I was a stay at home home, so I could be there always when my children needed me most. It has been worth the sacrifices of less money and no fancy trips to foreign lands just to be with them. I will never take any of my children for granted or wish they were in school and not at home. This experience made me want to soak these children I was given in and love them, play with them and make every day count.

     We have prayed a lot over Brett. Brett was blessed with a good doctor who prescribed us some medicine to give Brett with his lung infections, which contained a steroid to take the swelling out of his bronchial tubes. In the beginning we had to take him into the doctor each time to get the medicine prescribed and then start him on it and wait for the swelling to go down, which all took time and made Brett suffer more. When this doctor saw how frequently Brett got these infections he went against personal and medical rules and gave us a prescription with endless refills. We were able to keep this medicine in the refrigerator and every time Brett would start to talk like he was out of breath, only getting part of a word out without a gasp for air and we knew another one was coming on, we could give him medicine and his infections wouldn't get so bad. That was a blessing. I am happy to report he has outgrown his lung infections with having bigger bronchial tubes and his heart murmur can no longer be heard. But sadly he has not outgrown living dangerously and getting hurt.

Because of his love of sports I made him a birthday cake with a skier skiing down a soccer ball. He broke his bones doing both these things he loves.

He dressed up for Halloween two years in a row as an accident victim. How fitting for Brett. I was thankful these injuries weren't real ones.

I am so thankful I am a Mom. :)